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A healthy relationship starts in your own head, so here's an exercise you can do RIGHT NOW

If you got notification of this blog post, it's because you signed up for real, actual tips and tools to take your relationship to the next level.

But the truth is, most people collect guides on their hard drives and never get to apply the advice. I don’t want you to be one of those people.

So I decided to send a tool right here, that you can start executing today not tomorrow. Afterall, tomorrow's relationship will be built on today's mindset:

1. Close your eyes and recall the latest little spat you had with your partner.

Got it? I'm assuming so since your eyes are definitely open again and reading this. ;)

2. Now close your eyes again and think about the first time you realized your partner was someone you wanted to spend your life with. What made you smile? When did you realize you were in love?

Bring that feeling into your heart.

3. Think about that spat again. How does it feel different this time around? What is the most generous assumption you can make about your partner and why they behaved the way they did in that spat?

What is the grace you would give your friends if they behaved a similar way?

Why do you think you're reluctant to give your partner that same grace?

If you're like most of us, you're angry. But anger is almost always a secondary feeling, and underneath that anger, you're probably hurt and afraid.

Afraid that nothing will ever change.
Afraid that their actions mean they don't really love you.
Afraid that this isn't going to work. Maybe this relationship is broken.

Whatever it is, let's just acknowledge that the fear is there, that it deserves your care, and that it doesn't get to be the deciding voice in your relationship.

4. Say these affirmations, and come back to them as often as you need. Tomorrow's relationship will be built on today's mindset: 

  • I can be firm AND loving with my needs and requests.

  • I love my partner deeply and am intentionally working on deepening our connection.

  • I am respectful to my friends, and will treat myself and my partner with the same respect I give them. I am a friend to myself and to my partner.

  • I know all the effort I put into building a happy relationship is worth it

  • I spend time thinking about how I can help my partner succeed to be the best partner to me they can be.

  • I am a wonderful partner, and can take time for myself.

Come back to this as often as you need to keep working on giving yourself and your partner the grace you need to. And stay tuned! I'll be uploading a free relationship meditation soon.



P.S. If you're ready for a powerful conversation that will decide the future of your relationship, schedule a relationship strategy call with me and I will help you figure out exactly what needs to happen to meet your #couplegoals.


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